Hell Hath No Fury Like A Party Scorned

I once turned vegetarian for 6 years to win back a boyfriend I’d had for 6 months. Now, don’t get me wrong, I didn’t pine after this guy for 6 years (I met someone else within months) but the decision had stuck, and did stick for 6 miserable, baconless years.

And that kind of sums up how I feel about the EU referendum.

In May 2015, the Tories were unceremoniously dumped by some of their more right wing supporters. They’d met someone else- someone younger, thinner and with bigger tits. They had cheated on the Tories with UKIP.

“They’d met someone else- someone younger, thinner and with bigger tits.”

And the Tories behaved like any spurned lover would. They promised they would change; they flirted with other leaders (Obama, you handsome beast!); and made fun of other potential mates (“eww Jeremy Corbyn? He dresses like an old man!). The referendum (like my vegetarianism”) was a completely unnecessary move. It’s been forced on us so the Tories can be more appealing to their lost lovers.

Unfortunately, unlike my meat-shunning antics, the referendum will potentially have long lasting and devastating consequences for everyone in the UK. Both sides are filling us with propaganda – they would, it’s a popularity contest and they want to be picked – and a lot of decisions will be based on emotions and fear. And unfortunately, if we do something rash (like an extreme short haircut or a wonky fringe) we can’t just “grow it back”, change our minds. The decision we make on 23rd June will stick, like it or not.

“The referendum (like my vegetarianism) was a completely unnecessary move.”

I would urge you in the next few weeks to read as much as you can, and discount anything that seems too much to be true. Discount the racism (if we stay, the borders will not open indiscriminately. If we go, the Romanian family round the corner will not pack up and leave on 24th); discount the crazy claims (neither option will make us rich beyond our wildest dreams); and discount anything that just sounds stupid (possibly to do with fruit). Find the facts, make your decision and cast your vote.

And while you’re at it, make me a bacon sandwich.

Some articles I have enjoyed: 

Delia Smith article

Ben Chu article
Michael J Boskin article
David Mitchell article
BBC website

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